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Helping Hand – Life Coaching

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life balance

Cocooning – What Is It & Why Do I Need It?

THE DICTIONARY DEFINITION OF COCOON IS ‘SOMETHING THAT ENVELOPS SOMEONE IN A PROTECTIVE OR COMFORTING WAY.


As a life coach I am often presented with clients who are paralyzed by indecision and overwhelmed by stress. The words “I don’t know who I am any more“, or “I cant seem to make even the simplest of decisions” are frequently uttered.  People are loosing their way and their identity at a rate I have not seen before.  Divorce, Job loss, Work Stress, Home Stress all contributing to an overload that is breaking us.

People are lost!


So what can we do & how do we get back to a more sustainable life style?

As an insect may wrap itself in a silky case to protect its pupae stage, then so too can humans. When a time for reflection or quite is needed or when change is forced upon us, cocooning allows us the time and safety to selfishly hide away.  Here we can process what is happening to us and allow ourselves the time to adjust.

Cocooning is every bit as important to us as it is to the insect.

newborn-1584746_1920From the very first time we were wrapped in a cosy blanket, cocooning us in a protected bubble of love, we have had a desire to return to this when ever we are worried, sick or scared. Snuggling up in a soft blanket on the sofa, or snuggling down in a feather filled quit is without doubt comforting to us all but for some reason, we often feel guilty when we take the time to do this.   As if it is a pleasure we have not earned or deserve.

Well I disagree with this thinking.


I believe we all need to feel safe, we all need to feel protected and sometimes we absolutely need it for our sanity and mental health.  I feel cocooning in times of need is a vital and important part of healing and the difference between coping and not coping.

I help many of my clients to find their way and often we start with a process of cocooning that I call Finding You.   It is an easy process, requires no great skill or expense and begins the process to get back in touch with who we are……..

And like the butterfly, Cocooning enables us to move on to the next stage of our lives, stronger, more beautiful and with confidence in our choices.butterfly-1218884_1920

 

Please accept this small gift to help you on your road to self discovery.

When you are ready to feel whole again, to feel in control again or dare I say HAPPY again. Please email me and I will teach you how to continue down this road……………..because you deserve it!

Also read Doing a Shirley Valentine The ultimate cocoon time.

 

What do we mean when we say ‘Life’s a Beach!”

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I guess it can mean many different things to different people but for me I think it represents a connection back to our roots. There is a soothing sense of well being when I sit watching the never ending rolling of the sea as it breaks relentlessly against the shoreline. As my busy mind lets go of the multitude of thoughts all vying for my attention and my body settles in the the rhythm of the waves, I find a peace that is embracing & very welcome.

I feel connected to our planet, in a way I don’t anywhere else!

From this serene and content perspective my body heals & my mind becomes focused, not confused. Problems find solutions easily and life regains the balance it needs.

What does it mean to you?

  DANGEROUS RISKStop waiting – life is too short! 

Contact me now – lin@helpinghand-lifecoaching.ca

The Law Of Attraction – Is It Working For You?

When used correctly The LAW OF ATTRACTION is a very powerful tool.

The trouble is, most people don’t know how to use it properly and so they do not get the results they are after.

Simply saying you’re a positive person or even thinking positive thoughts, does NOT GET YOU WHAT YOU WANT! It’s NOT like magic, there is NO genie in a bottle, NO magic wand to wave…. The Law of Attraction  is an applied process, that must be learnt and fully understood…  Then and only then, will it open your world to a whole new realm of possibilities.

I have been using this Law of Attraction for many years, with some quite remarkable results…. In fact just this weekend, amazing things happened in my family, a couple of days after I asked for them.  It truly is mind-blowing sometimes, just how quickly things come to be. From two very stressful and difficult situations Saturday night, to solutions by Monday evening & in BOTH cases………… exactly… as I had detailed the request Saturday night.

Continue reading “The Law Of Attraction – Is It Working For You?”

“How Can Coaching Help Me?”

This is a question I hear often from callers to my App Help Line, it’s usually one of the first things people ask. Some hImageave tried counselling or a therapist in the past and cannot see how coaching may differ or get them results.

“Dont we need to be face to face?”   –  Is the next question, usually followed by

How do I know if you are any good?”  So here are a few answers :-

Coaching differs from other forms of therapy in several very important ways.

Coaching is not NOT about your past, it’s about moving forward, so coaches do not spend lots of time trying to identify psychological problems or to diagnose conditions.  We may need a general idea of what has happened or of who you are, so we have a better idea of what has already been tried and what was successful or not.  We also do NOT write prescriptions or diagnose any conditions, ever!  We are not here to label or judge you but to assist you in your endeavour or aid you to solve your problem.

Coaches use carefully crafted questions and fine tuned listening skills to help you find your own answers.  We do not tell you what to do or how to do it, we guide you to your own solutions.  This way, as a plan of action unfolds, it is likely to succeed because YOU are the one mapping it out.  A coach then helps you to keep on track or adjust your plan as necessary.

We do not need to be able to see you to help you. In fact I find it better to have voice only sessions with my clients as this enables me to HEAR the things that arent being said, better. Subtle tones in a voice or hesitation in answers, can mean a lot to a trained coach and this gives me an indication of what questions need to be asked next. Asking the right questions is a huge part of being a good coach. 

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So how do you know, if I am a good coach or indeed the right coach for you?

Well you can goggle me or check out my website, where there is a lot of information about me and some client testimonials.  If you need more go to my Cancer Blog, but ultimately it’s probably a trial and error situation. If you are not happy after the first session, then you do not need to do more.  I do not require my clients to pay upfront for weeks or months in advance, and I also will refund you if you are truly unhappy (although I have never had to do this yet).  I have also found that coaching can be successful in just a few sessions, with the average being around 6. Not the months on end that many seem to feel is needed.  I will also allow pay as you go coaching sessions so you don’t have to pre book your time months in advance. As long as we can find a slot when you need it, you’re in.

So to recap:- YOU GETManOnCell

  • No judgment or character assignation
  • Help to find your own Answers
  • Convenient, just pick up the phone, IM or Skype.
  • Usually does not take months to achieve success
  • Can use Pay As You Go no need to pre schedule
  • Client Testimonials for piece of mind
  • First session refundable, if not happy.

Make 2016 the Year You Make The Change.

Contact Me Now!

I Gave Myself Cancer!

I GAVE MYSELF CANCER

To live a fully functional, fun filled life of our dreams, we need to be healthy. Without our health there is no balance to life, the scales are tipped heavily towards struggle.

I know because my ‘scales plunged’ when at the age of 44, Cancer entered MY LIFE.

I survived YES but at a cost; my physical body can no longer do what I want of it and when I can, there is always pain and then more pain. I often am unable to travel; have to back out of plans and can loose whole days to the pain.

What I thought would be my future, no longer applies.

I am however adaptive and am thriving in a different and more sedate way. But this took much time and don’t let the courageous spirit fool you! NO one, wants to have to deal with or fight through, a serious health issue or learn to live with a chronic problem.
We DO, but not by choice and however brave and well balanced we may seem………it’s always a struggle…..and was not a part of our dreams or life goals.

SO when I say to you, that looking after your health is the first step towards the dreams and goals you wish to achieve, towards that life you have planned for yourself, believe me, i know!

Accidents happen over which we have no choice but diseases like Cancer are not accidents, they occur because our body was too weak to fight it off. Because we allowed the stress and pace of our lives to deplete us and Cancer got its chance. This can apply to most chronic illness. One may be genetically predisposed to get a certain disease but it will only manifest, if you allow your mind and body to become overrun by stress hormones and lack of good nutrition.

WE MUST TAKE RESPONSIBILITY no one gives you these health issues, except you! This is why I say “I gave myself Cancer!”

Granted, there are some things over which YOU have no control, environmental toxins or background radiation levels to name a couple but are you doing anything about those that are within your control? Have you removed all toxic chemicals from your home? Have you started cooking fresh unprocessed foods again? Do you take the stairs or walk to the store? Are you taking good quality Vitamins? The list goes on.

Now my intent with this blog was not to talk about myself and or lecture but to impart to you just how very important your health is. We tend not to think of it until we have a problem. I know I didn’t ……i ate a good diet and exercised alot and thought that was enough…..it wasn’t! To be the first person in my family to get Breast Cancer, is not an accolade I’m proud of, I assure you.

In the 13 years since that fateful day, I have read and leant much and now believe we absolutely NEED to ease the stress in our lives in any way we can. We cannot rely on our governments or doctors, their interests are faulty at best. This is something we each have to do for ourselves, to evaluate where we are and where we are heading. Correcting a course is not always easy but its a damn sight easier, when it’s not enforced as mine was, when options can very quickly, become limited!

We also need to eat organically AND supplement our food with good nutrients and vitamins* So as to give our body and mind what it requires to function with optimal health. And with good health, comes good sleep, good decisions and the chance of actually living that well balanced life of your dreams.

You owe it to yourself and your family to be Physically & Mentally healthy enough to reach for and make those dreams come true!!

I write this today from the Mexican Riviera Maya to where recent events in my life have led me and as I sit here typing, I am contemplating yet another change in my life. Partly out of necessity but also another step towards a life of more balance and more importantly of Health…..because with good health you have options. Please don’t waste yours.

*Even organic food can be lacking in nutrients, as the very soil is no longer as rich as it used to be.

Is Your Life Flashing By? An Experiment In Slowing Time Down.

Do you ever get so busy, or excited by the things you’re going to do, that your week just flashes by?Sands of Time

You get up Monday morning and before you know it, Sunday evening has rolled around again and you’re left thinking………….”Where did it go?”

We race from our jobs to our homes, to the stores, to our children’s activities, fitting in some social along the way. Life is hectic for most and 24 hours no longer feels like a whole day

How can we slow this down?

Time is a funny thing; when we are having fun or enthusiastically wrapped up in our lives, it races ahead leaving us reeling to catch up with it. In fact I often feel that my life is passing by like the proverbial Hare on steroids……with a couple of exceptions:

  • When I am in pain
  • When waiting for results of tests

Both of these events seem to slow my life down to an almost unbearable tortoise pace.

Clearly you don’t have to be a genius to realise that its things we DON’T want or DON’T like, that cause time to drag……………but why?

Now I know it’s about perception but if that is the case, why does our subconscious slow it down when we don’t want it to be slow and speed it up when we want the opposite?  Makes no sense right?

We have all heard we are supposed to ‘Live in the NOW’. To be completely present in the moment but the only time that seems to happen for me, is in the above situations or with considerable effort. This started me thinking about how I could use this perceived ‘slowing down of time’, in a positive way? How can I take the fun and excitement and slow down these moments too?

Is it even possible?

If you have been following my blog for any time you will probably know I believe in and use a gratitude journal to help me focus on and achieve the things I want.  It is a powerful, tool which allows me to bring my dreams into reality (if you missed my latest blog on this click here).  So I want to experiment and see if by using this positive NOW method, I can also slow down the pace of the fun stuff too. To become focused in the moment and excited all at the same time.

To perceive time expanded, instead of diminishing.

For the next month I am going to add the following to my gratitude now journal:-

“It’s really wonderful how much time I seem to have, I am able to get everything done that I want to and still have time to spare”.

I invite you to join me!

Lets see if we can change our perceptions of time and with luck enjoy it more!

I hope you take up the challenge and please feel free to add your findings on this blog or email me:- lin@helpinghand-lifecoaching.ca

Coach Lin

Life Coaching – Taking My Own Advice!

So I need to apologise to all my readers for my absence the past few months.

Things in my life were becoming very hectic.  I have several serious health issues to deal with, My youngest son was getting ready to move with his family to the other side of the continent and my work load was becoming stressful. ……………SO I took some time off.

I stepped back from it all and took some time out to reevaluate how to move forward in a more balanced way.

Why am I telling you this?

Well, I want to show you that even though I am a life coach and ‘know better’, it is all to easy for life to spiral out of control.

The last time that happened to me, I ended up with Breast Cancer. so now I try to be more aware  However, 12 years later, I was once again letting things drift into chaos and I was back on the cancer merry-go-round of poking, prodding and specialist appointments.

So after a few days rest and more rounds of medical tests,  I finally sat down and asked myself “what would I say to a client in this situation?

My answer came quickly “something needs to change, if you want changes in your life”.

One of my particular ‘hangups’ has been focused around my part-time tech job.  Even though my Coaching Practice is running well, I was finding it hard to quit this part-time corporate job: so I decided I needed to start with this and ask myself WHY ?  After much soul-searching I came to realise that I was afraid.  I have been dealing with Cancer and its fallout for 12 years, I realised I was afraid that if I quit, no one else would ever hire me.

It was only when I asked myself why that frightened me and what I actually liked about this job, that I realised the absurdity of these feelings.  I had not been happy in that work in a long time, in fact I resented the hours I was working in the role.  Plus, I did not want or have any intention of ever working in a corporate job again.  It was so far from what I wanted, that the fear of not having it, was ludicrous.

SO I QUIT IT!

Boy did I ever feel better the next day!  A huge burden was lifted and I felt free to move on in my life with enthusiasm and purpose, doing what I love, which is coaching others.

I am still having tests and still have many medical issues ahead of me but I feel so much lighter to have relieved myself of this burden.  The fear I thought I would feel is not there, not in the slightest.  I now feel I can take on what ever obstacles come my way in terms of heath issues, with renewed vigor and I know success.

I am also so very happy to be back doing what I love to do……………..blog and coach others to find the same great feeling when you know, you are in tune with your life’s purpose.

See you on the bright side 🙂

Coach Lin

IS IT TIME FOR AN UPGRADE?

We all face challenges in this life,

some more serious than others but challenges none the less. How those challenges affect our lives is very dependent on how you handle them. Some people seem to breeze through problems, however large, while others fall apart over seemingly small issues.

Which are you?

Do you bury your head in the sand and hope problems go away? Or perhaps you race around telling everyone your plight dramatizing them in the hope someone will fix them for you? OR do you rise to the challenge, accepting it and look for ways to either fix it or live with it?

Often the route we take is not conscious, it’s a life habit. A way of behaving and interacting in the world that evolved in childhood and feels as much a part of you, as is your big toe.

Or is it?

If you feel that your life is full of problem after overwhelming problem, it may be that your default way of coping, the one you developed as a child, is simply not working for you anymore. Your challenges may have simply outgrown this particular way of coping.

Sometimes we cannot even see what our default reaction is, until it’s pointed out to us and even then we may resist any change.

But changing the way you react to a challenge, is the only way to get a different result.

The only way to learn, to grow and to develop new more effective ways of coping; ways that are more suited to the adult challenges we face, is to change what is no longer working for us.

It’s time to update your Operating System!

Hi my name is coach Lin and I specialise in helping people deal with Challenges in their lives. If it is time to upgrade that system, to learn how to cope with challenges in fact how to thrive on them? Then its time to contact me…………

Together we can move you forward, towards a happier, healthier less stressed life.  I look forward to meeting you.

 

Why ME? read

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